afflicted with excessive sentimentalism
Reflection is a dangerous thing, especially for me— someone who has never thrown away a birthday card or deleted a photo of a loved one. My aunt gave me a friendship bracelet in 2004 and I found it the other day while sorting through old jewelry. The 20 year-old red string threaded between the blue plastic beads moved me to tears, for it to have lasted this long and been in my care. Last night I watched a TikTok I filmed in my last apartment in the January of last year and wondered who lives there now and felt sad. This is so constant for me, it’s embarrassing.
It’s not even the remembering that’s the bad part. It’s the missing. It’s the post-reminiscing douse of reality that things will never quite be that way again. Watching the DNA of the world around you change in incremental and subtle ways until one day everything is completely different and the things and people that once felt safe and comfortable fit into your life in different ways. And then if you indulge in that too much, it bleeds into your present and you find yourself mid-laugh, mid-celebration, mid-bask, thinking about how this too will be a moment to look back on one day. Diabolical little thing. It’s actually not all bad, of course, I’m being dramatic. But I can’t help but just mourn. All the good things that were. Also the ones that will be before they too become sweet and sad memory.
Lol!
Xx.
P.S. This year’s naughty and nice list is coming soon
P.S.S. Would the UHC shooter go on the nice or naughty list 🤔